Hidden gems
Do other people go through this? After a big life change? Moments of self realization? Mind-blowing discoveries?
I've never been through something like this. Most of my bumps in the road were just that. Mainly little things piling up. Stuff to get through or around. But nothing to really contemplate. Or nothing I was willing to contemplate. (But that's likely another blog post.)
This is different. It's like I turned my life to rubble (I said I was blowing it up), and now I'm sifting through it to find if any gems remain.
Fortunately, I am finding them. Although I am deeply surprised when they turn up.
I am amazed by my brain and what it has created. My subconscious has been sifting through things a lot longer than my conscious brain. It keeps offering me little glimmers in the dust, things for me to pull out, turn over, examine closer.
It also leaves me with questions not answered or maybe not completely answered. Maybe someday I'll look back and see a complete picture. Maybe the gems will be reset into a new piece as I create a new life.
Until then, I'll take them as they come.
I'm glad I have this chance to discover more about me. I hope others do, too.
It took me about two years after my divorce to do that—to "sift through" and to finally find the "real" me, the me that had been lost for decades. It is like we slowly disappear when we become a wife, a mother, a daughter-in-law, the person we have to be. Once we are free, the true "us" returns and we discover so much we had lost, we discover the person that we lost. It is a wonderful journey. Enjoy! Love you!
ReplyDeleteIt’s too bad we lose ourselves. I wonder if everyone feels like that — by committing to a relationship you are giving up yourself to create a new couple. It’s too bad, in hindsight. We’d be better off staying true to ourselves. The relationship would benefit by both parties being true individuals who share themselves equally.
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